Let’s talk about…kids and government

adult affection baby casual
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

How in the world can we give our kids what they need in life if our government sticks it’s nose in our home and personal affairs?

I am not one of those people who want to over throw our government, but let me tell you… after looking at this mornings headlines and like many other mornings. Most certainly, like many other days of headline news, the government is invading our personal “bubbles”.

I just think that it is our own personal right to discipline, guide, nurture,  and love our own kids  the best way we see fit. Too often you hear about the government charging parents with something that their children have done, yet the government tells us that we are not right when we try to punish them and in the way we see fit. The kid, in my opinion, would not had been in trouble so much, enough to warrant the parent’s arrest, if they had of had some form of discipline or consequence, for their actions. Yet, our government steps into our homes and calls it child abuse.  Um…ok…not.

I am not a gun-ho disciplinarian, but I did punish my kids when need be, and they did get consequences for deliberate disobedience. I would have probably been locked up myself, considering that our government thinks physical punishment, is bad. I also did a lot of re-directing, my kids when they were young. It worked most of the time, but there was occasions it didn’t.  I had time-outs, and taking away privileges and “what not”but I disagree with the government telling me how to do things when it comes to my own family or my own free will.

I am not trying to start a “over ride” of policies or start a “hate” campaign. I just wish that the government would mind their own business. I do not walk into their offices and tell them how to do things, especially when I don’t know what it is about. Follow me here? Even if you agree or disagree, we should come to a joint agreement that we all are entitled to certain inalienable rights. Right?

One of the most important things we have are our kids. Our children are the best gift we have been giving. If we have our hands, “tied”, how are we to help them to be the best and happiest , that they can be.

Locking the parents up who spanked their child…

Or walking into a person’s home and removing their kids, without just cause or on a “here say”…

I have a hard time with this.

There are real cases of abuse and deliberate harm to a kid that happens. There are mean parents that intentionally hurt their kids. They should be the ones to get put into jail. When there are people though that want what’s best for their kids, they should be commended.

Not apprehended!

Thanks for reading!

Have a good day, share away!

Michelle, MwsR ❤


More Information for you!!!



Parental Rights, Parental Responsibilities

The U.S. Supreme Court has held that parents have a fundamental right to rear their children without undue interference by the government. (Pierce v. Society of Sisters, 268 U.S. 510 (1925.) But, in the same decision, the Court upheld the power of states to force parents to ensure that their children attend school. So, parenting is by no means an unfettered right and, as with many rights, it carries significant legal responsibilities

https://www.criminaldefenselawyer.com/resources/criminal-defense/juvenile/parents-responsibility-childs-criminal-actions



Status crimes

Some parental responsibility laws hold parents legally accountable for allowing their children to engage in conduct that would not be illegal if done by an adult, such as skipping school (truancy) or breaking curfew laws. Truancy and curfew violations are considered “status crimes,” because they penalize conduct that is only illegal based on the status (in this case, age) of the person engaged in the conduct. As mentioned above, the U.S. Supreme Court has upheld the power of states to compel school attendance. And parental responsibility to make sure children attend school is an “affirmative duty,” meaning that a parent has to actively ensure their attendance. (An exception to truancy laws has been made for home schooling that meets state standards.)

Courts have also upheld parental responsibility under curfew laws applyed to minors, based on the vulnerability of children and the public interest in protecting their welfare.



Contributing crimes

Any adult, not merely a parent or guardian, may be prosecuted for contributing to the delinquency of a minor if the adult encourages or induces the minor to engage in criminal activity. For example, an adult (whether a parent of a child or not) who furnishes a minor with alcohol will be prosecuted under state law penalizing contributing to the delinquency of a minor. Unlike parental responsibility for status crimes (which is generally based on negligent parenting), parental liability under contributing crimes is based on the parent (or other adult) having actually enabled or induced the minor’s illegal conduct.



http://www.apa.org/monitor/2012/04/spanking.aspx/

Parents in the domestic trenches are probably not all that interested in what the research shows anyway. Despite a battery of disciplinary techniques, including the infamous “time out,” redirection and the increasing emphasis on positive discipline (try substituting “hold the cup carefully” for “don’t spill your juice”), spanking and slapping are still pretty popular.

Moms and dads who spank do so because they believe it’s effective, and research actually shows that it is — in the short-term. A child reaching for a tempting object will stop if he gets swatted. “It does work in the immediate moment, but beyond that, in most cases, it’s very ineffective,” says Holden. “The most common long-term consequence is that children learn to use aggression.”

http://healthland.time.com/2011/06/28/would-you-record-yourself-spanking-your-kids/



https://www.newsmax.com/US/spanking-studies-children-spock/2010/01/07/id/345669/

Dr. Diana Baumrind of the University of California, Berkeley and her teams of professional researchers over a decade conducted what is considered the most extensive and methodologically thorough child development study yet done. They examined 164 families, tracking their children from age four to 14. Baumrind found that spanking can be helpful in certain contexts and discovered “no evidence for unique detrimental effects of normative physical punishment.”

She also found that children who were never spanked tended to have behavioral problems, and were not more competent than their peers.

As in climate change, politicians all over the world seem out of touch with the most rigorous science regarding parental discipline. The newest research could constitute powerful ammunition to parents rights activists seeking to reverse the global trend of intrusive governments muscling themselves between the rod and the child.

Read Newsmax: Pro-Spanking Studies May Have Global Effect | Newsmax.com
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http://www.imom.com/21-creative-consequences/#.W3rn1_ZFxYc

 

Bittersweet

 

 

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Bittersweet and special were the days with the sounds of running through our house from our three children. When I think of them, I have a smile on my face. Our three kids were close in age and the first two were girls, with the last one being a boy. The many adventures and fun we had during their childhood. I believe for many reasons it kept me young at heart. I was able to stay home during their school years, not work, and often I feel very blessed to have had that opportunity. Kids grow up so fast, it would seem if you blinked for just a millisecond, the time would surely pass you by.

Our oldest daughter was an artsy” kind of gal. She literally spent most of her free time drawing or creating some abstract “thing-a-ma-gig” whenever she could. She would spend hours finding things very small and tiny to craft together and create something genius. We were always amazed at what her hands and mind came up with. She spent a lot of time studying creatures of the outdoors too. I use to brag that she knew everything about everything in the animal world. That was not far from the truth, she really did learn facts and pile them into her smart head. She retained her knowledge of things really well. I think sometimes she must have been born with this stuff already in her”wiring”.

Our second child, was our little song bird. She always ran towards the music side of things. She stayed in chorus groups all through high school and learnt the piano well enough to fill in for her music teacher at times. She was always the social one of our two daughters and she grew to be taller than me, which isn’t standing taller than most of her peers she felt often time, awkward. Her dad and I though thought she was great anyway. She used that height to play sports and run in track so I’d say that was a blessing for her. She hated being the youngest daughter but she did like the fact she had a younger brother.

Our son just graduated from high school and he is very talented as well. Saying this , of course from a mother’s perspective, but it is true. He taught hisself how to play the string instruments very well. He also has a wonderful singing voice. He , like my youngest daughter excelled in music. He stayed in choir all through his highschool. His talents helped him to become more social and he stands tall at 5’10” .The two last kids got their height from their dad.  My son, like all boys, wanted to be tall and he got his wish.

I am very proud of the many talents each of my kids possess. The main thing though as their mom is that they are happy, truly happy. I would not want them to ever feel disappointments, or sadness or defeat. Truth is though our lives were not made to be without any of those feelings. If we learn to gather things from things we go through, we will be the better for it. Sure it sucks, feeling those kinds of things but it is necessary. That way when the best, happiest, most sweetest moments come, we can enjoy them all the more. As a mother I want to always see them smile in the end, after whatever comes their way.

Isn’t funny how we can get so caught up in a moment or situation that we fail to see what really matters, or what we really have when we have it? I sometimes do for myself, and I miss my kids younger days when it seemed there was not much of worry, or anything else that would harm their spirits. As parent we must not fail to remember those times, or those moments when things were special. We must also try to pick our children up when we can and show them it will be okay. Sometimes there are no answers to things and we simply must try to walk them through it. I am not a parent genius or expert, but I know that we only get this one life and that our children grow up so fast.

Take time to remember, reflect, redirect and renew.

Kids grow up too.

Parenting is not easy

Desperately, I look for some re-assurance, some acknowledgement,that everything I have done was handled the right way. I try to stay positive, yet there is so much I question and  then question again. Did I not do all I could to ensure that my family is happy, healthy, and have their needs taken care of?

family of three lying on bed showing feet while covered with yellow blanket
Photo by Simon Matzinger on Pexels.com

Some people in the parenting world question all their actions, thoughts, words and feelings at one point or another. I,myself, have been doing this here lately. I have three kids and they have been my whole world for so long now. Now, they are going to be all graduated from high school, in a matter of weeks, and I am finding myself wondering about so much of my life, in regards to them. I am going to watch my youngest graduate in a few weeks. For some reason though I am feeling some kind of way. No, it isn’t going to be the empty nest yet although I hear that will come later on. For some reason I find myself wishing my kids were still in that middle school age. You know, the age when your kids still wanted to hang out with you and do things with their parents.

For me, raising my kids went fairly well. My husband and I were always “hands on” parents. Meaning we went to all the games of sport our kids choose to participate in and we went to all the awards, and concerts they were in at school and otherwise. Our kids have been our sole purpose in all we do and undertake and work for, other than the basic essentials it takes to live. I wish I had of had parents like us.  I would never say we were the absolute best parents a kid could have, yet I would say we were plenty patient and loving and encouraging.

Here lately though, as I count down the last days of my last kid being in school, I am torn between being happy and being sad. I am definitely proud and relieved to say the least, but still. I know there is times when it seemed like this graduation thing was never coming and my husband and I fretted for the final outcome. But alas, we are almost there. As I sat in an awards ceremony last night I was reminded of all the kids that I have known since they were in kindergarten with my own kid and how much they had grown and how they too were graduating. It hit me hard. It was almost sad enough that I almost teared up. I had worked for the school system and at one point or another I had personally got to know all these kids in one way, shape, or form and it was a proud moment, a happy moment, and a sad one.

I figure this all is normal. I also figure that every parent who reaches this point in their kids lives has the same or along the same thoughts. It just is a time to reflect. It is also a time to be proud and also a sobering time. So many emotions, so much on my mind.  Which brings me to my first paragraph again, in that as a parent you want to know that you have given each of your children a  good start in life that is going to be beneficial to them. You will question your motives, actions, thoughts, and interactions. That is normal to think those things. What you should try to focus on though are the positives, not what if’s and all the blessings you and your family has had along life’s journey together. You might not always be together but you can always keep the bond. All you have to do is HANG ON 🙂

Thanks for reading!!!

 

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