June 2022 – Page 3 – Mws R Writings

Poem

Dad, my first guy, by MwsR

Pictures are all I have
They are like a wound with a little salve.
You are and always will be
The very core part of me.
I know you existed I see and hear about it all.
I just wish you were still here for me to call.
Often you are in my head
I find myself thinking of you while looking ahead.
If one little wish I was able to make
It might be to see you, you know before the ache.
Dads are more than a name we give,
They are the ones that teach us how to grow and live.
I never got to have that with you
I often think about what if and it makes me blue.
Others get to call up their dads and talk
Some get to spend time with them and go for walks
I get to ponder and wonder a lot
About what I have and what I do not.
It is not your fault I am sure you would have stayed
But that wasn’t how it all got played.
Taken too soon from this earth and your family
The ones who loved you and made you happy.
I guess some things never come to be
Like my wish for you to have known me.
Or maybe just to spend the day talking to you
And carrying on about the days that we went through.
It’s a good thing memories come around
Because that’s all some have when their hearts start to frown.
Dad, I know if you knew me
You’d see a lot of you inside of me, probably.
You would have also known how much you meant to me…you know why,
After all, you were my first guy.

Photo by Karolina Grabowska on Pexels.com

Slow Healing

Hey, there’s been a lot going on lately. Also, it appears to be not so much. I know I’m healing. These things like healing though, take time.

Each day I feel more healing but I’m also very sore each day. I gave pain patches and pain education but some internal pain cannot be stopped. I feel the broken ribs in my chest the most. Although I have many fractures in my pelvis, the chest area hurts me the most.

Sometimes I long to be outside looking and tending to my garden. I miss it. I worry about all the work I had done before the car crash. I have prayed that God would ease the stress of things I have had to just let go of, those things that otherwise I’d be working on, finishing, etc.

Not only have I had to have patience, but I’ve also had to wait for some things. That alone is hard. By not standing on my right leg which would hurt my pelvis fractures, I feel very little pain there. Unless I accidentally misstep or pivot wrong or try to move wrong. That can trick me into wanting to just try and use it. Which would make my healing that much longer and more painful. So I just talk with myself daily.

I miss walking. I miss laying flat or on my side in my bed. I have to sleep semi-sitting up in a recliner. That is hard. I get some sleep but it is not the best sleep. I wish for my bed. I wish for sleeping on my belly as I had before the car crash.

Anyhow, I’m ok with my husband being by my side daily. His taking off work to take care of me. I like the attention. I also hate waiting though, as I have said.

Keep praying for me.Thank you.

Michelle♥️