Category: Writings

Garden Of The Heart~ Poem

It is unmeasurable, the grief

The regret, swarms my heart.

Nothing in this present day can make it better

Now, If it were to had been taken care of, back then, perhaps!

Only solitude and thoughts can even begin to start a process

With every remembrance of things, working through

No one is suspect of all the turmoil,

Not even the magnitude, in my heart, lays

Silence invades the outer edges of my tranquil garden

The one where I planted all my pain

In this garden, things that were left to grow, now they take over

The absence of pursuing the many weeds have left me void of profit

It has greater calamity and stress.

Where if I had of stayed with it

Creating a great profit, I would not be here

Where I am now.

Everything will take its own time,

It will in its time, take over.

If you leave things to the wayside, they will creep up again

Even bigger and more stronger than before.

Tend to the gardens in your heart and thoughts

Do not forget to

It will be a long time coming, but it will eventually show you

What you did or did not do.

How you cared for or did not

Same for the garden in life, as in the heart.

MwsR ❤

Hope Again~poem

Anxiety over shadows the life I should have

My dreams became fence posts to keep the anguish away.

How can I face a tomorrow when I cannot make myself free?

Am I am just a vessel with no apparent reason for existing?

In my mind I have lived a slave’s life

Slave to the desire to love, beloved, and kept in love.

Like a ruler of a thousand kingdoms

With none who really want me to be

I tried on

I must

Not sure why

But if there is a slight chance I may matter to one,

I will let that lead me to hope again.

MwsR ❤️

Back~poem

All, I give

Al, I have gave

Offered my heart

Yet, still, it sits

Waiting, for it all back.

MwsR❤️

Poem

Rest Some

By MwsR

Can’t seem to fix it

Nothing can

It’s the spot within yourself you can’t stand.

Tried so many different ways

To stand above it

Yet silently you were sinking.

In desperate times

Truth rears it’s head

What makes a man, is constant dread.

No magical beans to help you escape

The turmoil you find when you hesitate.

There should be a trigger, a warning sign

But sadly none that controls your whole mind.

When fallen,you attempt to rise

There is no limit to your disguise

You try the truth but allow the lies.

Just one step you took so long ago into the wrong way

You can’t escape the effects , no how,no way.

Until you stop yourself from shirking your responsibilities.

Your endless torment of “what use to be’s.”

So gather up your strength, your battle scars

Things are seldom how you feel they are.

Put one foot then follow with another one

Till your back where you wanted and can rest some.

Choose To Be Blind

Snow is pure and fluffy sometimes

Unless it has been corrupted by pollution or someone’s path

If we were to examine it, what would we really see?

Not what falls from the sky, so pristine

Much like snow, people are deceivers

You see the outside and judge accordingly

But what you cannot see is the inside

Oh how we see what we choose to

How we fail to see through

That is the game of deceive and receive

No one is sure, but all stay blind

Willingly and noticeably.

MwsR ❤

Poem

Just Dirt

It was the way he moved on it

The struggles he did bear

The dirt that covered his tears

Marking a path that many may had trod

But never one as innocent as he

He bore more than our part

With great pain he fell to the dirt below

He used all his might to carry on

Working through the pain heading for that rugged tree

It was just dirt that cushioned his steps

But it was his love that saved us.

Image result for verse describing jesus falling when carrying the cross

Poem

No Other Way

Hers was always lacking

She expected so much

Felt so deeply

She never knew the right way to smile

It was growing up that taught her

But loss that made her

She was strong but in efforts, most unspoken

Most of the time

The cards had been laid out before her

They were already dealt before she made her request

“Spirit”, that was for those who longed to live after death

She wanted to live in life.

Always trying so hard

Never fully getting anything

Hers was tears of sorrow

For that kind of love,

That had never noticed her.

Continuous defeat

Continuous lacking

Her best bet was to let things happen naturally

In their own way

But that never worked either,

Usually things and people went away

Oh, if life were to give her some comfort

Naturally was not her forte

Forcefully was.

Maybe that was her main issue

Maybe her demise.

She knew no other way.

MwsR ❤


Blue~ Blue Hurts Too

Blue never really understood why she was hurting someone’s feelings if she asked questions about where she came from and things of that nature. It just seemed natural that she would want to know the people who brought her into the world and gave her up for adoption. She was pretty sure if the tables were turned they would want to know too.

Never did it occur to her that the family who adopted her would wish to keep the information surrounding her adoption a secret. She was wanting to know who she walked like, who she talked like, whose eyes she inherited and so forth. Never did it cross her mind that that would be taken as a slight against the adopted family. She loved them and merely wanted to know simple things. She had always ben very inquisitive but mainly kept her questions to herself because she was always told, “Kids should be seen and not heard”, ugh. She never agreed with that, not one bit. After al it was her life she was inquiring about and she deserved her questions answered.

Her adopted family did not se things the same as her, though. They really got aggravated and angry or dismissive when she approached them, any of them. One way or the other she would get her answers and she knew just how to go about getting that done. She would sneak around the house where she knew her mother kept private things, or things of value. She would have to wait till she had time alone at her home or a time when left alone. She hidden her mother put things away and she knew exactly where she would go looking. She also knew if she ever got caught , there would be hell to pay. Not to mention, the opportunity might not come again.

So to plan her scavenging, she needed to know about what everyone in the household would be doing in the following days ahead. She wanted to do things sooner, rather than later, if she could. Anticipation was getting the best of her. She would take some glances of things while she pretended to do her chores, such as dusting. This would be the perfect coverup for her snooping. She was really betting that there was so much she would be able to find, especially in her mother’s chest of drawers. That would be her first place to look.

Why was it that the family thought she had no right to know anything about those who gave her life? She really just could not get that they kept the things most important to her, in their own minds. It was rightfully hers to know. Did they not believe that she could hurt to? That she had feelings that really mattered? Of course it was looking like they did not care to share. But that would al be taken care of son enough, doing it her way. Blue was determined, and she really could hurt too.

MwsR ❤

To be continued