Butterfly, poem

 

As if I am beneath your feet

Like a floor with which your feet pound upon.

I am innocent and  so wronged

A victim to this never-ending position you leave me in.

It would appear that you have scrapped all the flesh from my bones

Left just parts dangling in the wind for all to see.

Therefore no one knows the real me.

No one can see past your charades of caring.

I feel it when I see them staring.

I know they would as soon accuse me of ill will

But I am the one whose soul begs itself to love still.

Like a wilderness trail few will travel alone

Yet, here I am feeling this way, inside my hearts home.

If dreams could make wishes come true

I should just stop trying so hard to rise above this suffrage and deceit

When will I be able to finally retreat?

Torment some of you’re doing, some of my own

I need to sift through it, and refuse to store it up

As if it were something that I would later go back to.

I do not want to go back to those times, those issues

Like a butterfly formed from a caterpillar

I want to emerge beautiful and with purpose

Living each moment as if I had no recollection of the former times.

Not letting you take me back there, not for one more second.

Butterfly…

MwsR ❤

 

Smells, poem

 

The smells always get to me…

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Photo by Leah Kelley on Pexels.com

Someone you are meeting for the very first time,

Lofting from a warmed up oven waiting for your food surprise.

Handshakes that were given at a cordial hello,

The scent from the lotion that the other person used so.

Something that has begun to spoil

When someone exercises and their bodies are hot

A windy day that blows past your nose

Drinking from water from rubber hoses.

Clothes fresh from the dryer

Your armpits after a lot of perspiring.

Savory food fresh from a grill

Someone’s mouth when they are real ill.

Paper from a printing machine

Things sometimes you can’t recognize or cannot be seen.

Flowers in bloom

And a straw broom.

Infections of all kinds

Things that never even crossed your mind.

Dirt from the earth below

Gifts of perfume, from people you know

Sniff and smell

Lots of different things as you can tell.

Too many to list

So much of them are bliss

Smell your world and wonder

Smell your life.

MwsR ❤

 

Death

One day there will be a time to die

That day will be one we must endure

The day will come when our life will try to make its great escape

When the only sound we really will be listening for

Will be the voices of those that we held dear.

Food we will not need  and it will be the least on our minds.

We will come to a point when nothing more will really matter

When the noise from death drowns out all the chatter.

A calmness will either be there or it will not

It will be out of our hands as we are soon to depart

People will come visit but to ease their own pain

It will appear that, they all are just vain

They will bring with them memories

Memories of a time you once participated in

A time when life seemed very special to them

You might see clearly or things could be cloudy,

But your ears will work and be on guarded detail

You will lie there, you will come in and out of dreams

Some faces you might not recognize, some people possibly you had never seen

A mirror will no longer tell you sweet lies

The bed will be your station, and on it you will lie.

An occasion touch or two directed towards you

An offer of some water, and the smell you caught of someone’s perfume.

It will be the most impersonal time,

The most strung out, lingering time.

Who will be there to see your last breaths

Will it be strangers in uniforms or family

I hope you won’t be lonely when it comes to your end

I hope you find yourself in the middle of family and friends

I hope your death will not be long and drawn out

I hope it is peaceful and in dignity you will die.

I wish this for all.

MwsR ❤

 

 

Mine

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Photo by Wendelin Jacober on Pexels.com

The hurt is mine

It grows with each day that is absent of you

I know that it is my burden to bear.

Mine to endure, mine to keep it inside.

I feel sometimes in searching for answers to things, my heart will surely die.

Like a prisoner, I do time for things that I feel.

Things that make me feel like a human, like  “real”

I understand not everything has answers for an ailing mind

But somehow I thought answers I would one day find.

If I had known all my feelings would be swept into a forbidden corner,

One that no one cares about,

One that separates me from others for life…

To get inside certain packages, one must use a knife,

My feelings were inside,

It took time to get them opened up,

But it happened, despite my unbelief.

I will never be a closed up heart again,

But that does not mean my heart will mend.

I hurt, I feel so alone with it all.

My only answer to this insane is God.

He hears my cries, comforts my excruciating tries.

He lifts me up so I can see a new and different place to feel safe.

If he could let me borrow another heart, just once

I would let it display out loud and strongly.

I would not hide it, and let it crush me.

That is what I would do.

MwsR ❤

Poem

DISDAIN

Disturbed cannot adequately describe

All this hostility, you fuel, that is hidden inside

My hands are nothing to the power of heartache

You are the one who engulfed my mistake

You sent nothing in turn for the love lost

I ,in turn, turned my feelings into cold frost

Sent away not in word, but deed

This was internal and I started to bleed

The blood pooled up around me

While you got on with your life

I gently tried to gather the broken pieces, you cut like a knife

Constant stain that always follows me

It is the bereavement of how things used to be

More jagged and sharper than I ever felt

Was the point, that made my joy melt.

Gone today, yet lingering tomorrow

Always, forever, no escape, truly ever.

Wishing it all had been a bad dream and happened , never.

MswR ❤

 

Poem

 

Equal And Opposite

There is no greater love

Than that, that is given successfully and unselfishly

There is no power

Greater than your own mind.

Things that are few

Yet far between, can great become

When listening fully

You can unravel secrets untold

Just opening a book

You can understand a lot.

Wrapping your heart

Despite the savage cuts to it

Will one day come to be a benefit for you.

Every action has an opposite and equal reaction,

Science has told us this.

Don’t think too much,

Just learn to live.

MwsR ❤

 

 

Intrinsic

 

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Photo by Zaid Abu Taha on Pexels.com

Intrinsic it was for me

To be there with you, you see

Birth made us sisters

Life separated us.

Circumstances created a void

People helped t form a wall

That is the hardest of all.

Why must our hearts be connected in this universe

But it was so hard to find each other?

Unfair, yes

Deceptive our lives became

To us, only

Sadness is part of the intrinsic bond we have

Joy comes I believe to those in search of it.

When our lives are at their end,

Things work to bring us, back together, to mend.

Intrinsic our relationship, yet complicated to say the least.

Intrinsic is what I think of when I think of you and me.

MwsR >3

 

 

 

When Your Heart is Torn, MwsR

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Photo by Studio 7042 on Pexels.com

Here we are. Separate places but together in life.

We are not making memories, instead we find ourselves wishing.

Your life is coming to an end,

I cannot stand knowing it is.

I just want to make your life, your whole life better than it was, is.

I want to take away all your hurts.

Crazy how we came from the same mother,

Yet we do not really know one another.

We both have had things tied to our necks all of our life,

Some intentionally placed and other things our hurt hearts invent

We drifted in life, yet life is drawing us back together.

I hear your heart, almost like I knew you well.

I know you are scared

I am too.

Waiting on this life to end is so scary.

Either in your own experience or in knowing someone you know, facing it.

It seems what grips at your heart, also helps to keep it going.

What takes a loved one from you, brings you almost closer than in life.

I know that tomorrow is not promised , not even for me.

I fret to think yours is ending , why does that have to be.

In a few years of our life, we met once, talked some, yet

Oh sis, I am so broken as to how to help you, when I am lost.

I do not know what I will do, knowing that things change so harshly.

I feel stuck in this void of us.

I will try to love you in the end of days the best I can.